|"Dude, everyone needs a|
vacation. Come back later."
The Oracle at Delphi closed up shop and made no prophecies between November and February.
Why? Who knows. Maybe the hallucinogenic vapors emanating from the crack of the center of the world weren’t as strong when the weather cooled.
This was tough news for Alexander, who had marched 40,000 warriors from Macedon to visit the oracle before invading Persia. It was November and he’d just missed the last performance. But he needed the priestess's blessing. His men would not follow him into battle unless they knew the gods were on their side.
“Come back in February,” temple guards told Alexander when he requested a consultation anyway. He asked nicely. He pleaded. He begged. But temple guards only had two words for him: Go home.
|"Whaddaya mean you won't see me?|
And I got my hair done and everything!"
Alexander flipped. He burst into the temple, grabbed the priestess by the hair and dragged her toward the sacred altar, demanding a prophecy.
“You!” she cried in outrage, “are invincible!”
She probably meant, “You are an insufferable little brat!” But he heard, “You will not be stopped in battle!”
He released her. Grinning, Alexander marched back to his men and announced that the priestess said no one would ever defeat him. His men cheered and happily set off a-conquerin’.
Even in the ancient world, some folks just never took “no” for an answer.