I did, however, remember to bring Drag-Queen Cleo to the North Georgia mountains. And she had, as usual, something to say about everything:
Upon finding a cow, the queen proceeded to lecture it
on the value of "adorning one's horns with gold."
A garland of flowers might help with that
bovine scent," she also suggested. The cow tried to eat her.
Mistaking a barn cat for the Sphinx, she again
went into lecture mode. "Look," she said. "I love you and all
that but you have GOT to come up with a better riddle, m'kay?
That 'What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon
and three in the evening' crap is so TIRED. Liven it up! Go
for something like, 'How many queens does it
take to rule the world? One! Me!"
Drag-Queen Cleo refused to go rafting with us ("Honey,
I don't DO water trips unless they're on my golden barge.")
However, she was not above giving the photographer
tips on improving her work. ("Go for the drama," she advised.
"If there's not enough blood, I'll gladly have one my
guards spear the boatman for you next time...")
Drag-Queen Cleo refused
to accompany us on the ziplines.
And that's me deciding to jump straight
into the rapids, saving myself the
trouble of falling outta the boat.